Post by alphalackey on Sept 7, 2022 13:48:29 GMT -7
Hello all, just catching up with my subordinates who were on the scene in the Energy City to give me the 4-1-1 on our first ever community meet and greet.
Consensus: the jersey designs were an absolute smash success. First overall expansion pick and franchise future Elias Pettersson was on hand to show off the threads. Here's what you can expect to rock the home opener.
One awkward situation arose when a season ticket holder, an unidentified man living in "none of your fuckin' business, ya government stooge", took to the open mic and said he was gonna air his grievances "like his name was Job". He told us what (and, it must be emphasized, spelled 'w-h-u-t'), he was looking over the roster and there was NO WAY he was going to pay his hard earned money on, and I quote, "your Saros-backed globalist liberal horseshit agenda".
After being reassured of what turned out to be a rather humorous misunderstanding and spelling mistake on his part, we were happy to accept this vagrant individual's season ticket deposit... once it had been properly sanitized.
Indeed, I would like to take the opportunity to remind all fans that the team will be backstopped by a Finnish superstar athlete in the prime of his life, and not an elderly billionaire.
Thank you, and go 'Dogs!
Consensus: the jersey designs were an absolute smash success. First overall expansion pick and franchise future Elias Pettersson was on hand to show off the threads. Here's what you can expect to rock the home opener.
One awkward situation arose when a season ticket holder, an unidentified man living in "none of your fuckin' business, ya government stooge", took to the open mic and said he was gonna air his grievances "like his name was Job". He told us what (and, it must be emphasized, spelled 'w-h-u-t'), he was looking over the roster and there was NO WAY he was going to pay his hard earned money on, and I quote, "your Saros-backed globalist liberal horseshit agenda".
After being reassured of what turned out to be a rather humorous misunderstanding and spelling mistake on his part, we were happy to accept this vagrant individual's season ticket deposit... once it had been properly sanitized.
Indeed, I would like to take the opportunity to remind all fans that the team will be backstopped by a Finnish superstar athlete in the prime of his life, and not an elderly billionaire.
Thank you, and go 'Dogs!
Attachments:
